A Good Laugh, Just for Students, Random SLP, Uncategorized

You Still Know You’re An SLP Grad Student When…

5. Your friends ask if you want to consider a Caribbean cruise in the fall and your response is: “Sorry guys, I’ve got ASHA…” (although let’s be honest, they were never going to pull the cruise plan off anyway!)

image from: cobusbahamas.com
image from: http://www.asha.org

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

4. You high-five the person next to you in the computer lab because your pediatric client’s final case summary for the short, 8-week summer quarter is only 12 pages long! FOR THE WIN!

3. The kids you nanny for decide to play “word association” in the car on the way home from camp and you subconsciously start taking an inventory of their semantic networking skills

2. Your initial reaction while watching The Dark Knight Rises is: “Holy mama, Batman is going to have some serious nodules if he keeps that phonotraumatic voice going much longer!” http://www.collegehumor.com/video/6643191/batman-chooses-his-voice (warning for one tiny quick moment of bad language!)

image by Warner Brothers

AND…

1. Listening to the following link is actually a legitimate part of studying for your AAC class final: https://faculty.washington.edu/dowden/sphsc540/Notes/TextSpeechSample.wav. I think we can all agree that NO ONE WOULD PICK WENDY!!!!!

A Good Laugh, Just for Students

You Know You’re A SLP Grad Student When… #2

Dear SLP grad students (and anyone else who just wants to laugh and relive those golden years you spent in a master’s program):

You already know I like top 10 lists.  Did you also know I like top 3 lists?  Well..secret revealed!  For whatever reason, this spring quarter is proving to be the work/effort equivalent of the last 2 quarters…combined and on steroids.  Not only am I eternally stressed out, but I am surrounded by a cohort of basket cases (albeit hilarious, brilliant basket cases) 5 days a week (and sometimes even more if we decide to convene on the weekend and toast to surviving another week).  Today though, I had some funny conversations that inspired the next round of You Know You’re a SLP Grad Student When…

3. You Feel a Sense of Accomplishment When You Only Have 20 Unanswered Emails in Your Inbox:

It’s not that you don’t want to talk to people and catch them up on all the fascinating, amazing, glorious things you’ve been doing with your copious hours of free time…  It’s just that you have a new email-organization system now.  It’s called: “mark as unread.”  This is, quite possibly, the button that gets clicked most frequently in my inbox on a daily basis.  Since we deal with PHI in our UW emails, we have to keep that inbox separate from whatever our personal, non-school email is.  What does that mean?  2 separate email accounts to stay on top of!  My typical email interaction goes a little something like this: (1) open new email (2) read it and make a mental note that I reaaaallly want to respond to the sender (3) realize I don’t have time to respond to said email in the given moment (4) realize there’s not a chance on God’s green earth that I’ll actually remember to respond (5) click the glorious, “mark as unread” button, henceforth turning that email into a brand-new eye-catching message just waiting for my undivided attention.  Problem? When you return every email into an unread one, you just have an inbox filled with read-re-unread-ified emails.  Welcome to my world.

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2. You Self-Diagnose on the Basis of Your Lecture Notes:

Let me paint the scene: you wake up to another morning of classes and clinic.  On a scale of “1 to sleep,” you have been falling somewhere around a 3 for the past week…and things aren’t looking up anytime soon.  You haven’t even made it out of bed and you already have a headache.  The nightstand light is your new nemesis and all hopes of “looking cute for clinic” go straight out the window.  Guess your poor little artic client will just have to see you in that black cardigan…again.  Upon standing (insert applause here for making it all the way out of bed), you feel a little dizzy and your arm is sort of asleep from laying on it the wrong way.  BUT, as you automatically start mentally reviewing your slides for the neurogenic disorders quiz you’re bound to have in an hour, you start analyzing…and overanalyzing…your morning cornucopia of symptoms.  Headache, sensitivity to light, numbness in one arm…HOLY MADRE DE DIOS, you’re having a freaking stroke.  You panic for a moment or two before regaining a glimmer of sanity: “Come on Hanna, a stroke?  At 24? That is soooooo irrational.  It’s waaaaaay more likely a brain tumor.  Or maybe upper motor neuron impairment…I was feeling a bit spastic and rigid just now.  Wait, I know…I have, um, you know…HOLY CRAP…anomia!  I’m gonna webMD this ish right now!”

This, my friends, is the double-edged sword of knowledge.  The more you know the better you are at your future job, and yet the more you know the more you start to convince yourself that you (or your roommate/boyfriend/cat) actually have every disorder that’s brought up in class.  Yup, even Moebius Syndrome.  Perhaps not all the time, but come on…I know you’ve at least considered most of them at some point in time.  Let’s get one thing straight though.  You probably don’t have a brain tumor.  Or Parkinson’s.  Or even a specific language impairment.  You’re more likely stressed out and overtired.  Welcome to the club (sorry, no welcome baskets in this club…we are on the “grad student budget” you know).

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1. You Genuinely Begin to Consider How to Effectively Pull Off an ASD tantrum in the middle of a test:

It was a rough session for one of the clients at the UW clinic today…to say the least.  Autism with ODD, and he made it evident that he was donezo with therapy after 30 minutes in his clinic room.  I was in the computer lab with about 15 other classmates when all of a sudden, the halls were filled with the sweet, ear-splitting sound of a major meltdown.  Considering how exhausted we all have been, I was only 70% certain that the screams of temper-tantruming anguish were coming from the 5 year old.  A solid 28% of me seriously questioned whether they might actually be coming from the student clinician working with him-it had, after all, been an epically long day already.  Then there was that nagging 2% that it might be all in my head.  Had my lack of sleep this week really caused me to go that bonkers?  In the end, he screamed and cried all the way down the hall.  As I thought about the effectiveness of this meltdown as a potential exam-escape-tactic, a small part of me reeeeaaaallly wanted to go out there, high five him, and say: “Well played my friend, well played.”

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Not to worry, there will undoubtedly be more You Know You’re a SLP Grad Student When… posts in the future. In the meantime, good luck in your classes and clinical sessions tomorrow…may the odds be ever in your favor!

A Good Laugh

You Know You’re a SLP Grad Student When…

Do you like top 10 lists?  Of course you do!  Luckily for you, I LOVE top 10 lists (almost as much as I love Ben and Jerry’s Smore’s ice-cream-which, by the way, is heaven in a cardboard container).  Anyway, today was like any other Tuesday of grad school at UW.  I woke up far too early to (what else?) rain, threw down about $300 for text books (big spender!!!), downed the breakfast of champions (coffee in a Starbucks to-go mug), and gained copious amounts of knowledge (of the motor speech disorders variety).  In thinking back on the last 6ish months of graduate school, it’s quite amazing how quickly you become a stereotypical “grad student,” although I do have to say we speechies have a few quirks that are unique to us and us alone.  I wonder if any of these resonate (or at one time resonated) with you…

YOU KNOW YOU’RE A SLP GRAD STUDENT WHEN…

10. You challenge your friend to a “number of pa-ta-ka’s in 30 seconds” competition.

9. You somehow kill 20 minutes talking about barium.

8. The kid you nanny for says he can’t find his DS and all you can think of is Down Syndrome (that would be Nintendo DS for all the “normal” folks out there).

7. Your neurogenic disorders professor asks what memory “looks like” and your (out-loud) response is: “shimmery silver liquidy strands that swirl around in a pensieve.”

6. You have a ratio of 1 male to 1,000 females in every class.

5. Toca Hair Salon and Auntie Maggie’s Recipe get played more than any other app on the iPad.

4. You say the following to your 22 year old roommate: “first we get coffee, then we grocery shop.  First  coffee, then shopping.” And yes, the repetition actually happened.

3. Your eye starts twitching from 3 straight hours of article-reading and you panic that you have obvious fasiculations and lower motor neuron lesions.

2. You tell people what you study and 9 times out of 10 the response is “Oh…so basically the King’s Speech, right?”

1. You diagnose all of your friend’s Microsoft coworkers with aspergers.